Life's Mystery

2009-06-10T13:49:00.000-07:00

One day I was surfing on the net, and found this blog from my space, it’s from my husband. He wrote it along time ago and I never know anything about it ’till now, of course I was moved and touched, even got teary eyed while reading it( am such a drama queen), nah…anyway when hubby got home, i asked him about it and indeed he wrote it a few months after we first met in Taiwan. Isn’t it cute? I think it is! OK here you go, read on….

"Thursday, July 14, 2005

Life’s Mystery

Current mood: awake

I can talk to her, I can see her, but I can only touch her through my heart. She is my one true love. Not a moment goes by through the day that I don't think of her, she is always with me. when I am down, she brings me up. When all is lost, she finds me. Who do I owe such a great honor too? She is a person for real! I have met her. But only once. So she does exist, not just in my dreams, yet she loves me, this is true. Why? I don't know? I only speak to her as a friend in kind and loving words as man should speak to a woman, and, yet she still loves me. Why? I don't know? I listen to her and the world stops and only she exists, is this why? I don't know? Can a woman's love for a man make him do great things or is it a mans love for a woman that makes her great? One thing is for sure, the woman in my life said to me, "The greatest gift a man could ever have, is a woman’s heart" and you know, she’s right! (I dedicate this to you Juvelyn for being the most beautiful woman in the world with a solid heart of gold, When god made you he broke the mold) "

Love will find its way...

2009-06-10T13:33:00.000-07:00

There was a time in my life that I had always wanted someone that I could love so deeply. I had so much love to give but never found "That Special Someone" to share it with. I never thought I’d find this kind of love. I thought that it was way out of my reach and would never come to me. Then one day I found the most wonderful man in the world.

It was summer of 2004 when Dave and I first met online. I was in Taiwan, working as a contract worker, while he lived in California. Two different places, two different cultures, countries so far apart!!! We found each other online in one of these dating sites on the internet called American Matching, well I think I found him first. It was just my first week since I signed up an account on that site, and one day after I got home from work, I went down to the basement of our dormitory where the internet cafes are…I usually go down there to surf the internet and chat with my friends and family back home in the Philippines. Then I was browsing on that site looking at some pictures of people I don’t know, reading their profiles and sending winks and love quotes to guys I found interesting. Dave is one of the members on that site and he’s one of the guys that I am interested at and so I sent him an email or a quote to kinda get his attention. “The most precious thing that a man should have is a woman’s heart.” It sure does catch his attention somehow, because he replied to my email. I was online that day on that site and he came on and message me. That was the first time we chatted. I still remember our first conversation. The first thing he said to me, “what are you looking for?” and I answered, “ a friend”, then he said, “good, me too.” So that’s how it started and then he asked me if we can move and talk to yahoo messenger and so we did. So we chatted for a while introducing each other and then he told me about this girl he met online I don’t know if he remember but I still remember her name. When we first started to chat, I never thought things would happen the way they did. We are talking only as friends. We have lots of things in common and I really enjoyed the time talking with him. I was with another guy back then that I also met online, but I wasn’t madly in love with him, it was the kind of relationship when you think that you are in love but actually you don’t have anything in common with your partner. He is a very jealous type of person and very impatient. I’ve never met him in person. And I remember one time we got into a fight and I was chatting with Dave, I was telling him all about it and it was funny though because I remember him teasing me about it afterwards because of something I said during our conference conversation, that makes him sooo mad. I think he got so jealous of Dave. Anyway, I broke up with that guy and I remember Dave keep telling me at that time that it is ok, and he always makes me feel better.

He is a few years older than me, but I figured age doesn’t matter if we have a good chat. We got to talk about many things, mostly music though. After many more conversations, I realized I was really starting to like him. We discussed everything, our likes, dislikes, our troubles and our dreams and the more we talked the more amazed we became at how much we had in common. Weeks went by and every evening we would meet up and talk, the two hours becoming four then six. The weeks had become months and after that I started realizing how much I love talking to him, and how much I enjoy sharing things with him, and I love to hear his ideas and the way he think about everything. So one day, he asked me if I ever think about him in a different way other than a friend, I never thought I would have to answer a question like that because I wasn’t sure my self what to say. I didn’t want to mess everything up by saying that I don’t think about him in any other way, in the meantime, I didn’t want to make him think that I love him in another way, I was afraid that if I find out later that I am not it would break his heart. I honestly don’t know what to say when he left me all the messages offline telling me how he feels. Well, it was Gabby’s fault (lol!) yeah, I was chatting with his daughter that night while he is making dinner and she said she have some secret to tell me and she started telling me how much her dad likes me. And then I remember her asking me if I can be her step mom. I don’t know what to tell her so I told her about this girl he met instead and how much his dad likes her, and me and her dad are just friends. So after that he came in and of course he read our conversation and told me to ignore what Gabby said. Then the next day I came online only to find all his messages telling me that he want us to be more than just friend. I was speechless, I don’t know what to say but then I was happy, I admit I have feelings for him too. But I keep it to myself because I don’t want to ruin our friendship. And that time his love was unfolded to me, I thought I was dreaming, I wrote him back telling him how I feel about it. At that time, my life change, I wasn’t bored anymore. I feel excited every time I come home knowing that he is there waiting for me. I look forward everyday of talking with him, spending hours online just to talk to him. I spent almost every waking moment talking to him and my sleeping moments dreaming of him. As time goes by we really found out that we really do love each other as much as we could just speaking online. We continued talking but this time it went on an even deeper level. It was so apparent to us both that we needed each other and everything about us was so compatible. I was able to finally send him letters and recent pictures of myself, and the way he reacted to them made me blush with delight. He told me how beautiful I was and everything. Although we see each other on web cam, I still manage to send him cards and pictures. As we talked more and more we learned even more about each other, helped each other through stressful times with work, family and just about everything.
After nine months, He said to me that he has the chance to come and see me in person, I was extremely surprised with what I heard and so much happy as well. We were so excited and as the time grew nearer we also became a bit nervous.

April 14, 2005, Dave flew to Taiwan to visit me. Finally he is on the plane ready to take off from American grounds to land on Taiwan’s airport where I would be waiting to meet him and pick him up. The night I picked him up at the airport in Taipei was filled with thrill, nervousness and excitement. I was so nervous that time, I am going to see him the first time in person but also I’m all alone and I am not familiar with the place. But the moment his plane arrived I cant describe the excitements I felt, I am nervous and happy that finally I will be able to touch him and hold him and kiss him. As he walked out into the arrival section, my heart was basically in my throat. I felt glued to the spot I was standing in when he came out. I stood there for what seemed like an eternity, before I could finally move. I looked at him standing there looking for me, he is sooo handsome and everything I had imagined him to be. Then he turn to where I was standing and he saw me waving at him. While I was walking to go around the people and railings my heart is pounding so hard I cant breath. I was so nervous and shy to face him, I couldn’t look at him in the eyes, but I manage to give him a hug. Oh I thought I was dreaming, I finally was meeting him! Though we had been far apart with the ocean between us and never met each other we did not feel unfamiliar. Maybe because of predetermined fate? At our first meeting I felt like I’ve known him for a very long time, I really do believe he is my soul mate. But, let me tell you, when Dave took me in his arms and held me for the first time, I knew that it was meant to be. How did I know? I can’t explain it. I just knew. It was a gut feeling and feelings coming from my heart. But, to explain how I knew he is the one, that’s something that I will never be able to explain. I look back on it now and laugh. But, that first embrace was all I needed to seal my love for him. When he put his arms around me, I knew that I hadn’t made a mistake.

We left the airport and took the car, which he rented, and while we’re on our way to the hotel he kissed me, it was our first kiss. It was a great feeling being with him at that time. We were so happy to finally be together. We both had waited for this for so long and now it was finally happening and we were so much in love that we didn't care at that point what anyone thought. we arrived at Caesar’s Park Hotel around 11:30pm. We checked in and went up to our room. He give me all the goodies he brought for me, a box of see’s candies, chocolates and candies of different kinds, he even brought a Dr. Pepper for me to try, hehehe. After i tried some of the candies he lean over and kissed me softly. Everything else fades into the background, we are two lovers in our own world. On the same night he proposed to me, he promise to marry me when the right time comes. Needless to say, I said yes. It was the most beautiful thing ever!

He came to stay with me for a week, and it was the best week of my entire life. We spent our time mostly in Hsinchu, walking along the streets of that little town, going out to eat, play pool and just spending time together. We loved being with each other. We spent a lot of time together just getting to know each other and having fun. We went sightseeing in Hsinchu and Taipei. We had fun hanging out, going out and doing everything every normal couple does. I had the greatest time. Every time he kissed me, and every time he told me that he loves me I just melted. I felt so right in his arms. He keep telling me how beautiful I am. I was so happy for the first time in a long time. I just fell completely in love with him.

Then the week has to come to an end, I was so sad, I cried when we reached the airport and cried just about the whole time we were there. He kissed my tears away and looked me in the eyes, held me in his arms, told me he loves me… it was the hardest thing to watch him walk away, but we both knew we had to do it. He told me that he cried too on the way home on the plane. The first day he left was the worst day. I missed him terribly. I couldn't believe how empty i felt after he left Taiwan. It was so hard to be without him. Many tears were shed while we talked on the phone and online. I went to work to try to take my mind off of my missing him so much. Talking on the net just didn't seem enough anymore. I wanted to be with him so bad and feel his sweet embrace and kisses. It was so hard being so far apart.

Two months after, June 16, 2005, I left Taiwan and went back to the Philippines. But being in the Philippines doesn't change the way I feel about him in my heart. Sure I will miss all the time we spent talking on the net everyday, knowing that I wont be able to talk to him as much this time. I love him so much with all my heart and I want him to know that he is the best thing that ever happened to me. I have never loved anyone as much as I loved him.

I am in the Philippines now and still very lonely. Although sometimes friends and family comes to hang out with me, it’s still not the same as being with him. I still miss him so much. I know he’s so far away from me but I don't look at it as him being a long way from me. All I know, my love for him grows stronger everyday, and he knows it…I know, the miles that lie between us will soon disappear, and we will have each other always. After a few months we started working on my papers, I was so happy that we have now a chance to be with each other. Though there’s no exact date when its going to happen but at least I have something to look forward to. He managed to file my application for my K1 visa around November 2005. While waiting for any results we still continue our communication online and not to mention some phone marathon as well. By March 2006, our case was approved and was forwarded to the embassy in Manila. I was so excited. I cannot wait to see him again. July 2006 I got my appointment for my medical exam and interview from the US consulate in Manila. Finally, I made it to my medical and interview. I was so happy I passed them all. We are going to be together pretty soon.

Then the most exciting moment arrived, August 11, 2006, the day I left Philippines to come see him and be with him. I was sad seeing my mom cried at the airport, saying goodbye is just the hardest thing for me. I left my family sad and lonely but then I have him and Gabby, his daughter, my new family waiting anxiously happy for me. By the time I got on the plane, I was totally excited. All I could think of was him. I sat on the plane with butterflies in my stomach, thinking of him and me and our life together. After 2 years of talking to each other on the net and on the phone, we finally made it. Now we are going to start a new chapter of our love story, where there is no distance that separate us, no more chatting on the internet, no more lonely nights, no more tears of sadness, its gonna be all good in the hood as he said, lol. My plane landed at LAX around 9:30pm. After the immigration officer checked me, I proceed to the luggage area and got my stuff. My heart was pounding so hard, but i wasn't nervous at all, I was very excited that finally i will be able to see him again. I started walking to the arrival area and hoping to see Dave and Gabby waiting for me but i didn't see them. I was never worried, i never thought that he wouldn't show up to pick me up. I was thinking maybe they were hungry and went out to get something to eat. I know it in my heart that he was there. I decided to call him but he is out of reach, so I left a message telling him I am waiting for him right by the phone station. After like an hour of waiting i finally saw him and Gabby walking towards me, Gabby holding a bouquet of flowers and a heart shape balloon with I love You print on it. I was just watching him walked, he looked so handsome as usual. So we gave each other a big O hug and kisses then I gave Gabby a big O hug too. It felt so good to be in the arms of someone you love and you really care of. I know everything was meant to be because i felt like i am home seeing Dave again after all the time we spend together just talking. I am very happy and I know he is too.

October 2, 2006, we finally tied the knot. We got married at Santa Ana courthouse, in the morning of the 2nd of October. Its a very simple wedding just the two of us besides the judge. I was so happy that I cried after the ceremony. We are now husband and wife, tied in a lifetime contract with no trade clause of love, honor, respect and dignity; to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part…So my love, I promised I would fulfill my words of honesty, a lifetime of fidelity, honor and trust among many other things and hoping you will too. Thank you for making me your wife. I am greatly honored.

Everything works out great between the two of us ever since and I hope it will always be. I stayed home being Mrs. Richmond, doing all I can to fulfill my duty as his wife while he works everyday. I love being his wife, I enjoyed taking care of him and doing little things for him and Gabby. Even though we don't go out or do stuff as much, I am happy just being with him and spending time with him at home watching him while he is working on something whether its the boat or the cars. We go out on the lake sometimes and its fun I like it coz i know he loves being out in the water with his boat. Sometimes it gets tough financially but its ok with me, I feel bad sometimes though because I wish I could do something about it to help him out. But at this time I am not allowed to work yet because we still have to do some paper works.

April 2007, we found out I am pregnant. I am so excited, although we didn’t plan it and i know its going to happen anytime anyway. Its a blessing and a gift from God. And I am thankful and honored for this gift of life that is growing inside me. Few months later, we found out we are having a baby boy. I know he is very happy coz he really wanted to have a son. I am very happy also. I cant wait to hold our baby, the fruit of our love, I am so excited theres only 2 months more to go and its the big day. We are expecting him to come out by December 9th or 13th . I hope and pray everything goes well and he is healthy.

So, I am writing this for Dave my husband in celebration of us, in our anniversary of love. I cant think of anything to give you on this special day but a lifetime of love…honey you have made me a very happy woman. I cannot imagine my life without you and I know you feel the same way too.
I have been truly blessed in meeting you as you totally change my life. I thank God every morning i wake up and turn over and see you laying there next to me. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for knowing all the little things that mean so much to me. Thank you for understanding that you and I need to take time together for fun, making love, talking and spending time together. Thank you for your kindness that i really appreciated most. For everything you are. I couldn't ask for more in a man. I want you to know that I love you from the deepest part of my heart and nothing and no one can ever change that.

As we travel on our journey, hand-in-hand, there is no obstacles we cannot get past. With you, I am happy. With you, life is good. I love you and want you beside me always and forever. Our story will continue as long as we live, it will only ends when we die…my love, I love you and HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!!!

your wife,
juvelyn

Love's Mystery

2008-07-15T12:38:00.000-07:00

Love is the best thing human beings do. Love is our glory, and it is also a power. Love is so powerful that even a little of it can heal and transform our lives permanently. We may go to the ends of the earth to find love or escape it.

What human beings mostly deeply want is total, permanent experience of love. Beneath all the strivings for recognition, power, money, and things, what we really want is love.

But what keeps us from experiencing it? Why is it that what we really wants is also very hard to get and keep?

Follow Your Bliss

Life's Mystery

Love will find its way...

Love's Mystery